I went to my first personal training session Tuesday, but it was really just an assessment. The good news? I have low body fat. Surprise surprise. The bad news? I suck at all other areas of assessment. I have ZERO flexibility (this has always been the case) and I am totally and completely physically weak (also nothing new).
Nothing new, maybe, but the severity of it all hit me today when I attempted to do my workout homework. First I got a cramp the second I started a short run; luckily it went away quickly but the pace of my one mile was, well, laughable. That didn’t make me feel too horrible though. I’ve gone through phases in my life where I run regularly and I know with a little repetition I can get better. Running is fairly comfortable to me. Walking, of course, is my most beloved physical activity and I feel like I’m meant to walk thousands of miles. Running is far less soulful for me, but it’s not awful. Even when I’m out of shape.
Then I tried doing some core exercises using a video. First of all, lol, yeah right, I can’t, I am so atrociously weak. Second, I’m so inflexible that I can’t do even the easiest version of basic exercise forms when the focus isn’t even on flexibility. It’s just horrible. Seriously. I tried switching to a yoga video because I just wanted to focus on stretching but it was so beyond my abilities I just gave up on the videos and went into my bedroom to stretch on my own. I just can’t believe how tight every muscle in my body is. How many muscles in my body I must never use. The single flex of a foot sends searing pain through my limbs. An attempt to sit at a 90 degree angle against a wall makes my lower back explode.
The trainer said that a lot of my upper back/neck pain probably stems from having such tight lower back muscles, which pull on the higher ones (or something). After going through tonight’s hell, I can only imagine what other ways my physical state impacts my life. Not just the back pain but the regular headaches. The daily fatigue.
I’ve always known I wasn’t really in shape, but I felt healthy because I do stay moving. Whether I’m on my hands and knees cleaning, or running from one side of the warehouse where I work to the other, or wandering on the beach, I move–a lot. Not at a high intensity, but I move. But suddenly I feel like I’ve been seriously neglecting my body. If this is me at 26, how on earth do I expect to age healthily? I can’t. I have to change. I’m probably overreacting and I’m sure if I stick with it, maybe tweak my eating habits some, I could see some improvement. But I don’t even know how I will find the strength or endurance, let alone the confidence, to get through tomorrow’s hour-long training session.